Thursday, January 15, 2009

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Besides being one of my favorite movies, this seems to apply for today
The Good
Ohio Couple Adopts Eight Siblings Separated in Foster Care. And they already had 7 kids!! You can read the article here:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,479811,00.html
The Bad
Foster parent charged with murder in death of Manitoba infant If you want, you can read the article here:

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20090114.wfoster0114/BNStory/National/?page=rss&id=RTGAM.20090114.wfoster0114

The Ugly

This is where I put in my two cents worth. Quite frankly there is so much ugliness in the Foster Care Sytem that I don't know where to begin.

  • There is increased drug use that brings more children into the system
  • There are never enough homes to house all the foster children
  • Group homes are often more like detention halls than homes
  • Children age out of the sytem without any support (real or emotional) at 18
  • It takes way too long for courts to determine the fate of a foster child
  • Child protective workers are overworked and underpaid.
  • Foster Parents receive too little support and too many scowls
  • States are continually cutting back on services

So why do I bother? That is easy.

(S) Came to us a year ago. She had just turned 2 and was very small. She was behind in her shots and she wasn't very well nourished. The story we got was only bits and pieces about domestic violence, living in the woods and an older brother who the satet had already done a TPR on. Basically, we had to start from scratch. She was not at all verbal and the first day she was with us I took her to the supermarket hoping she would point to those foods that she liked. It was the only thing I could think of because it was obvious she needed to eat. We bought brownies and doughnuts that day. :)

Fast Forward to 13months later (today). (S) is an intelligent little 3 year old. She has filled out a little but could still stand to eat more. She also keeps us going. She loves going places and I can't tell you how many times she has made us laugh. I had forgotten how funny little kids can be without even realizing it. Like when she came into the den the other night wearing a Mexican Hat and yelled "I'm a cowboy, YEEHAW". I don't know where she got that from but it was hysterical. Then there was the time I was having trouble buckling her into her car seat. When I finally got it to buckle she said "There ya go!" Last week we were in A.C. Moore buying some scrapbooking materials and on the way out a man walked into the store who was extremely rotund. (S) looked at him then looked at me and said "That's a big guy!" (I had forgotten they can be embarrasing too.

There were many trips to the beach in the summer both fresh water and the ocean. Last year she didn't like to get wet. We go sledding in the front yard this time of year. Last year she was afraid of the sled. We make only one thing for dinner which she eats (most of the time). Last year it was pizza and chocolate. She tries to read Dr. Suess books to herself. Last year she didn't touch the books. This last year has been nothing but joy when we are with (S) and she is a never-ending beehive of activity all by herself. I would not trade this last 13 months for anything and that, my friends, is why I bother!

2 comments:

  1. Oh, what a little sweetheart! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. There is a lot of ugly, you are right. That is why you are needed.

    ReplyDelete