Tuesday, September 28, 2010

The Wedding is Over......The Mystery Mansion is Silent

The wedding was beautiful. (A) looked absolutely gorgeous. OK, I am a little bias, but she really was gorgeous. Everything went off without a hitch.

We had Chinese Food on Thursday, a Bar-B-Q on Friday, and the wedding on Saturday. A few people for dinner on Sunday night, and the last person left was my son (B) who went back to Alabama this morning.

My father made it up here, got to see his great grandson and was able to stand up a couple of times and dance at his grandaughter's wedding. How special is that. This was no easy feat. He is not a well man and the trip alone was an arduous trek for him. He made it here and back and I can't begin to tell you how happy that made all of us.

So that was all well and good....now onto the business at hand...the adoption ......

If you are keeping track, we found out on July 22nd that the TPR appeal had been denied by the State Supreme Court and that (S) was available for adoption....Since then, we have filled out some paperwork, but nothing has changed. Over 2 months and we are nowhere!!!

I have gotten tired of talking to the CW and her boss. I called her the boss' boss today and left a message for her to call me. I didn't hear back, btu I will give her another day or two. Then, I don't know what happens next. I guess I will have to call the head of the Department of Health and Human Services.

You would think a state office that comes under that much fire and scrutiny would be looking for advocates. Who better to advocate for them then the foster parents and social workers that are on their side. Unfortunately, the way they oeprate, no one wants to be associated with that organization.

And they wonder why they are viewed so poorly.........


Thursday, September 23, 2010



Some people like visitors, some don't........I LOVE THEM!!!!

(B) came home on Tuesday.

My mom and dad, and my big sister and brother-in-law will be arrriving today

DWs little brother and sister-in-law along with our niece and nephew will arrive today.


Father-in-Law and his girlfriend arrive

DWs other two brothers arrive. One brings a wife along with our niece and nephew.

DWs Uncle and Aunt arrive

(A)s new -in-laws will be arriving

Everyone else lives locally....the plans...

Tonight.....Chinese Food for the visitors (only about 15 people)

Tomorrow night....Bar-B-Q for visitors (about 35 people)

Saturday night....Wedding (about 100 people)

Sunday noon....Small Brunch for a few remaining guests (I have no idea how many)

Monday...Stragglers leave and "Life goes On and On and On"

I know there will be plenty to blog about, but I don't know when I will have time, but I can assure you I will be having fun!!!!!!!!!!!!


Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Adding to the Family

We had a visit last week from the cw and we are not getting any closer to adding (S) legally to our family, but that hasn't stopped the clan from growing.

We will be adding 3 new members to our family on Saturday. (A), my oldest bio daughter is getting married on Saturday. Family is coming from all across the country (well, Georgia, Florida, Massachusetts, Alabama, and Texas anyway) to witness the event. The good news is we don't only get a new son-in-law and uncle for (S), but she is also gaining a niece and a nephew!

That is because (A)'s fiance comes with 2 BONUS grandchildren for us!! (T) and (H). (T) is 14 and (H) is 11.

I am so excited but alas there is so much to do, I am not sure there will be much blogging going on. On the other hand, there will be plenty of things to blog about, so I will either find time, or get behind and have to catch you all up on everything that has happened after the fact.

It is all good news though. It has always been about family with us, and what better celebration of family is there than a wedding? Well, maybe an adoption is just as good, but we will have one of those at some point this year too!!!

Well, I have to go bake brownies for company and then do some more cleaning and I am sure DW will be coming up with plenty more for me to do.

By the way, my son (B) is the one who comes from Alabama and he got here today. It is so good to see him. Since he lives so far away we don't get to see him often enough....glad your home son! Tomorrow we play golf together.


Saturday, September 18, 2010

A Loving Child


(S) is really a very loving child. There are times we will just be sitting there and she will look up at me and say "I love you daddy". Of course, I always tell her I love her too.

She always has a hug and a kiss for me. I really can't wait for the adoption to be final, but at the rate it is mocing, I have to wonder. We had our monthly visit from the CW this past week and she informed us that package one had a problem with it. Apparently she identified PTSD as an emotional problem and it was supposed to be identified as a mental problem.

She doesn't care......We don't care......(S) doesn't care.......some bureaucrat apparently does care. Either that or is looking to justify their job. In any event, the CW is off next week, so we are atill no further along in the process then we were the day the court finally made its final decision.

While it bothers me more than you can imagine and makes this whole process so frustrating, I can at least know that as far as she is concerned, DW and I are her mommy and daddy, and it doesn't matter what a judge says. We love her so much, and she is such a loving child. We are very lucky people to have her in our hearts.


Thursday, September 16, 2010

Too Much to Do

Once upon a time we had three children. They were all within 4 1/2 years of each other. Needless to say they kept us busy. There were always school socials, baseball games, soccer games, PTA meetings, gymnastics etc etc etc.

We made it through those years with three children with little or no problem. Yes, there were a lot of take out food nights, and a lot of running around with me going one way and DW going another way, but we made out fine. At the end of the day we would relax and all was well and we were ready to go at it again the next day.

So what happened?

Now, we have one child, (S) is going to dance and she is starting Sunday School this Sunday. There has been one PTA meeting and one curriculum night at school. This weekend is all filled up. We will be attending a party for (S) and two of her bio brothers we have set up at a local children's museum. It should be a fun time.

Unlike the "once upon a time" time, we are tired. I am yearning for a home day when we can relax and do nothing......It isn't going to happen any time soon....There is just Too much to Do.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

The Boy on the Bus


Yesterday DW had to work early, so I had to come home from work to see (S) off on the bus to school. She is so excited to go to school every day that it is a fairly easy task. The most difficult part is that she wants to go wait for the bus about a half hour before it comes.

So, after putting off the inevitable as long as possible, we go to the end of the driveway to wait for the bus. As soon as she gets on the bus, I will be into my car and go back to work. So we are talking about school and she just keeps asking when the bus is coming. I keep saying I hear it and it is getting closer, but until she actually sees it rounding the bend down the street, she can talk about nothing e;se. She is obsessed with its impending arrival. At this point I am thinking her obsession is because she likes going to school so much.

So the bus stops, I get a big hug and a kiss goodbye (certainly makes the trip home to wait for the bus with her worth it. She is such a loving child, but thats a different post.) and she gets onto the bus.

I turn around to get into my car so I can get going to work and for some reason, I decided to turn around and make sure she is seated on the bus before the bus starts down the street. I have had a few issues with schools in the past, and I just want to make sure that (S) is safe the whole way.

So I turn around and there are only about 15 - 18 kids on the bus. This is a failry large bus so there are plenty of empty seats. There is one little boy about 1/2 way down the bus who is standing up and kind of jumping around. I wonder why he doesn't stay seated, but then (S) sees him and sits down next to him. Now I am hoping her obsession with the bus is because she likes going to school.

I asked her about theboy after school. His name is Joshua and it seems she sits with him every day going to school and coming home from school. It really is cute. (S) told me that he makes her laugh.

Just in case her obsession with the bus is not becasue she likes going to school, I am waiting to find out his last name so I can google him. I have to make sure you know. :)


Monday, September 13, 2010

Adoption Party

When we took our required class prior to starting foster care we met about 10 other people who were in the class with us. Some were getting ready to do kinship care and foster the children of relatives. Some were looking into getting seriously involved in foster care and welcome many needy children into their home. There was one couple who particularly were looking to foster pregnant teenagers who no longer had a place to live.

There were even a few who, like us, just wanted to do respite care and help out here and there on occasion. (I wonder if any others are adopting?! :)) Anyway, there was another woman who was going to foster and was hoping to adopt. Well she has now got a little girl who has been with her since a few days after being born who is 2 years old and she is about to finalize her adoption.

She had a wonderful adoption party a couple of weeks ago. She had a photogrpahers there to take pictures, she had a tbale set up where kids could decorate cupcakes. She had another table with loads of "treasure boxes" that the kids could decorate, and then they could fill them with all the goodies that came out pf the pinata she had.

I wish I had been able to stay for the whole thing, but I had another engagement. DW got the opportunity to stay and enjoy the lobster that was served and see all the kids who were having a blast.

I can't wait until we have our own adoption party. It certainly won't be quite that extravagant, but I do hope it is a day that people will remember for a long time to come. Expecially (S).

So, does anyone have some suggestions for an adoption party? We have those ideas which are certainly nice, but we would certainly like to do something different so please comment with your suggestions. The best part is that once we have the party, not only will I be able to tell you about it, but I will be able to show some pictures too!!! I can't wait for people to be able to see how adorable (S) is.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

I had Never Been in a Talent Show and Thought this was my Big Chance!

So we are driving in the car the other day...(S), DW, and I and on our way to the store to get new tap shoes and ballet slippers for (S). Dance starts next week and last year's shoes are a little too small.

(S) is in the back seat and she is always making up games to play. This time, she decided we were going to have a talent show and first we would have the tryouts. Each of us had to make up our own song and sing it. I knew this was going to be my chance. I have never sung in a talent show before, but this was make believe. I knew I would make this one.

DW made up her song and sang it. DW dosen't sing all that well, but apparently (S) liked it and said that was very good. Then it was my turn.

I started singing and making up the words as I went along and actually was going pretty well. I was about 12 or 16 measures into the song when (S) says...

"That song is no good. It is off the list"

I was astonished. I asked her what she meant and she went further to say that I couldn't be in the talent show as my song was not good.

I'm so sad. I thought this was my chance to finally make a talent show. I guess my talents are better served elsewhere.

I never had any belief that I could sing that well, but I figured I could at least get into a make-believe talent show.

I guess not

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Getting Closer

I got a call on my cell phone today and it was from (S)' GAL. We haven't heard from him unless we called him in over a year. When I picked up the phone the call was lost. I was quite concerned because we don't usually have conversation with him, so I called him right back.

He was calling because the court is having their 6 month check-in. In our state, every 6 months a child is in the custody of the sate, the state has to report on the health and welfare of the child. The GAL said that since this was most likely the last time he would be reporting on (S), he wanted to stop by and see her and say hello himself. (once she is ours, there are no more reports)

Since we were not at home, he said he would meet us wherever was convenient. We ended up meeting at the Border's book store in town. The best part of the visit was that he confirmed we were getting close to the day of adoption. He knows the person who sets the court dates for adoptions and he says they have them every Wednesday. All we have to do is call him when we are ready, and he will do everything he can to make it happen the very next Wednesday.

I don't think it is going to be any time in the next couple of weeks, but we are certainly within a month or two. Then we will become adoptive parents. I am not sure it is going to feel any different though. We consider (S) to be our daughter already. It really doesn't matter what a judge says....I don't think. It will be interesting to see if we feel any different.

I know we will be relieved that the whole process is finally over, but I don't expect any more than that. We will see. I am sure there will be a blog entry for that day!

I can't wait


Friday, September 10, 2010

I Know They Have Gerbils, but are They Really Throwing Ducks

So (S) comes home from school. She gets off the bus with a big smile on her face. She has definitely enjoyed school and thinks that she is "all that" getting to ride on the bus. She runs up to me and gives me a big hug. We are lucky in that the busses drop the students off right at their house so I am just at the end of the drive.

As we walk up the drive I ask the question that all parents ask, and all parents wonder if they will ever get a real answer.

"What did you do at school today?"

The response: "I don't remember"

Well I figure I am smarter than her and I can get the answer......Yeah right.....anyway, I knew she had phys ed that day so I figured that was a good place to start.

"Did you have gym today?"


"What did you do in Gym?"

"We threw ducks?"

I obviously was not sure I heard her properly so I said "you threw what?"


"What kind of ducks?" I asked

"Duck Ducks!!!"

"You threw them?"

She then turned her head towards me and with a look of disdain and responded with "Yes daddy, we threw ducks!"

So now you know as much as I do about how (S) spent her day that day at school. We have since had opportunity to talk with her classroom teacher and I asked if she knew what they did in gym class and she said she really didnt know particulars. She asked why. I told her that (S) said they were throwing ducks.

She laughed...........

Thursday, September 9, 2010

The School Bus Man

Day 1 of kindergarden (September 1) and (S) is more excited than I have ever seen her. She can't wait to get on the bus. At 7:30am she is ready to go to the end of the driveway to wait for the bus. Great! Except the bus isn't coming until 8:30....we wait and wait and then can wait no longer. At 8:15 we are at the end of the driveway looking down the street for the bus.




8:40....still waiting

8:45...still waiting

8:50....time to get in the car. School starts in 10 minutes

9:00 we arrive at the school. The bus man is standing at the door along with a woman I don't know. The woman proceeds to tell me I can't park my car where I did as the busses park there. I was not happy and I let her know that since there weren't any busses it wouldn't be a problem and whenever the bus didn't show up I would park my car there to make sure my daughter got into the school.

The School Bus man didn't seem to know where the busses were. .....so, DW had already brought (S) into the classroom and I followed to check things out. I wanted to see the new larger classroom and it was very nice. As is should have been to start with. (S) didn't want to leave us and held on tight to my leg. We tried puching her away but wre not being very successful. Finally her teacher came over and invited her in with a soft hand on her back. (S) walked into the classroom and DW and I took that as our cue to leave.

On the way out, I asked the bus man what time we could expect the bus to come tomorrow. He looked at me and said (I swear this is the truth) "the right time".....

I went to the superintendants office. I had a very nice chat with her and she was appalled when she heard what the bus man said. She assured me she would make sure all was taken care of. Since she had been so effective in taking care of the classroom, I let her handle it.

So far, the bus runs fine since then. More importantly, (S) gets on the bus with a smile every day, and gets off the bus with a smile every day. She really enjoys school and is having a great time.

As far as the adoption process goes.....we are hopeful we will be able to sign the actual adoption agreement next week. We do go to court for a 6 month review next week as well, and hopefully have our monthly visit from the CW next week. Things are still keeping us busy and life is good...what more can I say.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Am I Behind or What?


I have been so busy lately. I am going to try to get caught up on happenings here. I don't want to bore everyone with one long post, so I will try to go little by little and get caught up.....

Last I wrote it was in reference to the size of the classroom for (S)' kindergarden class. Well, my conversation with the school superintendant worked out well. I had called her on Friday morning August 27th. She called me back on Monday August 30th which was just 2 days before school started. She said she was unaware that they were using that room for a classroom and she was not happy about it.

I was comfortable that she would do something about it, so I refused her offer to move (S) into a different class with a different teacher. (S) seemed to like that teacher and if the class was going to change all would be good.

The superintendant explained to me that she couldn't guarantee anything would happen in the next week or two, but she sounded sincere.

Sure enough, about 3 hours later on that same day I got a call from the school that the classroom had been changed for that teacher's class. I had never expected it that quick, or to happen before school started, but it did. I am happy about that. The classroom is a standard size with plenty of room for the 16 kindergardeners that are assigned to it. I am sure they will all have a great year.

So far (S) is enjoying school. There is more to tell, but I will try to get caught up a little at a time. In the meantime....
Packet one is still at the state capitol and we can't go forward with packet two until that comes back......We hope that is soon!!