Friday, December 17, 2010

What does Red in Chinese Mean?

This is in the category of "kids say the darndest things"

We were out shopping for Christmas presents for Shy's bio-brothers tonight. We are getting all the kids together tomorrow for our monthly "play date" and we are bringing presents for them. We went to Sam's club, and then to Best Buy. It was them over to the mall to see what we could find there.

After the mall, we ate dinner at the Ruby Tuesday's and then went to A.C. Moore for Shy's oldest brother. He loves drawing so we got him a real nive sketch pad and some drawing pencils.

Anyway, after that it was time to head home. We were about half ay home when I was stopped at a red light. It didn't take long before the light changed green, but unfortunately, the car at the front of the line was in no rush to go. Since I was.....I said in a rather loud voice (not loud anough for any other car to hear me but only people in my car) "HEY!!! THIS IS AMERICA, WE GO ON GREEN HERE!!!"

Eventually the car decided to go and we went on our way. A short time later, Shy says to me: "What does red and chinese mean?"

I said, well red is a color and chinese is what you call people from China. We also have Chinese Food on New Year's Eve (a family tradition). In any event, I thought I had answered the question and it was a fairly easy one, so I was happy.

Shy was not happy. Apparently I had not answered her question. What she wanted to know was "What does a red light mean if you are in China? Since green meant to go in America, it was an obvious question for her. Not so much for me.

My answer....well I really don't know. I assume that a red light meaning stop and a green light meaning go is the same in every country.....but then if that is the case, why would I say "This is America, we go on green here"

Heavy Sigh.........I have to be more careful with what I say, because Shy will catch me on any discrepancies........I love being her dad though. She really is fun and keeps me on my toes!!!!!!

By the way, does anyone know if that green/go and red/stop thing is universal? I have only driven in a few other countries and I didn't get in any accidents, so I guess I have been ok, but what if I find myself in Uzbekistan?

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Foster Care


currently we are not fostering any children. It is not something DW and I have really talked about either. We don't have another bed right now, but have talked about getting a bunk bed for Shy. I guess if we did that, we could foster a girl. (they don't allow for mixed sex room mates over the age of 5.

We do have another room with a little "pack and play" in it that I suppose we could keep a baby in, but with DW working a lot of hours right now, it wouldn't be practical to have a baby in the house. So I guess we will have to wait and see how things go.

We have not told DHHS that we are not interested in fostering, but we have only got one call in like the last 2 1/2 years and we turned that one down. My guess is that we are not at the top of their list right now anyway.

If we do foster again, I know it would be short term, so I guess for right now, I will just say we are on hiatus from fostering and we are just moving along with our new forever daughter who we love and cherish. At this point, we can't imagine life without her.

For the time being this blog will concentrate on issues that come up around adoption. Adoption was never in our minds when I started this blog. It is amazing how life can take turns we never would have anticipated. Anyway, adoption, and of course stories about Shy and our life together will be our focus. That is until we get another foster placement.
When that will be is anybodys guess!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Social Security Part 2

So I did not get asked back for the sequel.

I went to the Federal Building the next day with what I thought was all the information I needed, but there was a different guard at the door. This guard wouldn't let me through the metal detector unless I took off my belt.

I wasn't taking off my belt........

He wouldn't let me in......

Now, I understand the need for security in Federal Buildings. I understand the need to have a metal detector.

I understand that if I set off the metal detector I am subject to closer scrutiny.

I have no problem with any of that. But let me go through the metal detector first. If I set is off, then maybe you can start asking me to remove clothing. In any event, I thought about going back the next day. Here was my plan:

I was going to go to the toy store and get me one of those little kids cowboy belts with the cap gun six shooters. When the man asked me to take off my belt, I was going to take that off and put it on his little counter....

When DW heard my plan, she decided that it was time for someone else to go to the Social Security office.....Her.

I can't argue, it was probably a smart move. So today, she went to the office.

What we wanted to do was not only get Shy a new Social Security Card, but a new number with her new name. We can't trust her bio-parents and since they had her old number, we couldnt just change the name. So in order to do what we wanted to do, what is needed when you go is the following:

New Birth Certificate (original with seal)
Adoption Certificate (origianl with seal)
Government document showing her old name (We were told to bring her medicaid
information we had from Foster Care for that)
Social Security Card request form (got that at the office)
The person filling out the request also needed a government ID (DW used her drivers license)

The woman behind the counter told DW how to fill out the form. She checked all the paperwork and told DW that we would have a new card and number in the mail in 7 to 10 work days.

There was also other good news. While DW was in the office, no one had their cell phone go off, so the guard did not have to jump into action to ensure the safety of navigation within the building. DW did leave her phone on, but she had it on vibrate so even if it did go off, the guard would not have heard it.

So there you have it......

One last thing....I have a call into the senator's office to find out why I have to remove clothing prior to the metal detector.


Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Social Security

Shy's Birth Certificate arrived yesterday in the mail. We were really excited to see it, and of course we told Shy about it and showed it to her.

She wanted to know what store she could spend it at.........(hey its a certificate!! She really is a special child)

Anyway, we had been awaiting that so we could go to the Social Security Office and get her a new Social Security number with her new name. We were advised to get a different number by the case worker at DHHS so that her parents would not know her number. They also told us we needed to have the birth certificate to do that.

What they didn't tell us was that we also needed to have the adoption certificate with the seal. (we have it, but I didn't bring it). I also had to have an ID with me (I always do, so that was good). We needed to have a certain form filled out (they gave it to me, so I guess I will be filling it out later). and I need to have a Medicaid Card with her old name on it. Well, we only have little printed papers, as they don't issue cards to foster children. She will get a card issued soon, but that will have her new name on it. I hope we are able to find the old one with her old name. Otherwise, I am not sure what will happen.

I am hopeful that whatever I have will be suffcient. So tomorrow I will be going back to the Social Security Office to talk with the nice lady behind the window and hopefully I will have everything I need and the form filled out correctly.

The above is for all of you who are going through the process and want the information about how it works. The following is for everyone else who may just be looking for something to read.

In order to get into the Federal Building where the Social Security Office is located you have to go through a metal detector and there were three (3) guards there for the building to make sure you didn't set off any alarms. I was asked if I had a belt on. When I said I did, the guard told me I might have to take it off. I told him there was no way I was taking off my belt and then asked him if he worked for TSA because he was obviously at the wrong location. The airport is about 5 miles from the Federal Building. He assured me they were friendlier than TSA. That scared me.

I didn't care how friendly he was, I wasn't taking off my belt. Thankfully, the metal detector didn't go off and I was able to continue on to the Social Security Office to tend to my business with my pants still securely fastened around my waist.

Apparently however, those guards are not good enough for the Social Security Office. They have to have their own guard. Thank Goodness!!! You can't be too safe these days. All those retirees around that office are liable to start a riot at any moment. I was ahppy because I knew if one of the octogenerians were to attempt to cut in line in front of me, I was sure he would handle it.

So, when you walk into that office there is the Social Security guard sitting there. There is also a machine that asks you what you want, you push a button, and it prints out a number for you (just like at the Registry of Motor Vehicles, but not quite as high-tech), but in case you can't read it or figure out how to use it, the guard tells you exactly what to do. (I guess since someone else already ran us through a scanner, he doesnt have to worry about checking us out or actually guarding the office. (I wonder how many credits he gets toward social security for that job?).

Anyway, after a few minutes I found out the real reason that there is a guard there. There are signs all over the room that say "Turn off cell phones". It really was like flying!! Metal Detectors, no cell phones. I wonder if other electronic devices would have created a problem for the people in the office. Maybe it was just for the guard. He is rather old, and maybe he has trouble navigating the hallways of the building if there are too many cell phones in use.

Unfortunately, There was one lady who didn't turn off her cell phone.

That is when the guard sprang into action!!!!!!!!!!!

"Excuse me Ma'am, you need to turn off that cell phone."

Whew, that was a close one. He handled it so well, the woman turned off her cell phone. Thankfully, there was no need for a taser or handcuffs. (I kept my phone on vibrate the whole time I was there, but don't tell anyone)

Needless to say, I can't begin to tell you how excited I am I have to go back there tomorrow. I will be sure to report back.

Thursday, December 2, 2010


Well the bio-parents received the notification that Shyanne was adopted. So far, there hasn't been any fall out from it and the more time that progrsses without any fallout, the better I will feel. I still don't trust bio-dad though. I think he is a dangerous man, and that worries me.

Of course, I don't think he is that interested in Shyanne, but I do think it will be a matter of principal with him and his never ending fight against whatever he feels like fighting. Whether it be his wife or the state or something else, who knows.

In the meantime.......

Shy is doing great. She had been wanting the doors closed to all the "dark" rooms when she went to bed becasuse she was afraid someone would come and take her. Since the adoption, she has been less likely to ask for that.

She likes to play school. At her school they have now started using our last name when they call her and she has been testing the sound of that when she thinks no one is listening. I think it is great. She is certainly feeling more like a member of our family, and of course we have felt that way abotu her for a long time.

Her first report card will come home from school tomorrow. I know it will be good. After all, does nyone in kindergarden get a bad report card? Anyway, her teacher has told us she is doing well, so that is good enough.

Funny Story....

The school had a book fair and family night was on Tuesday. We all went to look at the books. WE got a couple of books for Shyanne's classroom and a bunch for her. While DW was looking at the books, shyanne noticed a boy from her class. She told me she wanted to go over and say hello so I told her to go ahead. She insisted I go with her.

She grabbed my finger and dragged me over to where the boy was. When we got there she tapped him on the shoulder and said hello. He said hello back and then they just stood there looking at each other. After about 30 seconds his mother said "come on its time to go"

Shyanne and I had ot follow him all the way to the door. she then said goodbye and that was that. So cute!!!

Anyway, enough rambling for tonight.

Happy Hanukkah to all