My DW asked me today and I don't have an answer.
Before I get to that.......(S) and I went sledding in the front yard today. It was a lot of fun. For a kid who wouldn't go near the snow last year, she is really enjoying it now. We went down together and on our own. She went down sitting and prone and seemed to love it best when the sled tipped over and she got covered with snow. She had snow pants on. I didn't. I got wet. Go figure...
Anyway, the question.....Assuming we don't adopt (S) and she leaves to go to another home, is she going to think we don't love her and don't want her or don't care about her?
She has no recollection of living with anyone other than us. While she doesn't call us mom and dad, she knows no other home. When she was with her parents, they lived in the woods for a while and with different relatives on and off. She was only 2 when she was remoevd from the home.
We want her to have youthful parents who she can spend a full life with but we don't want her to think we don't love her, want her, or care about her. That brings us to the second part of the question: Does the answer to the first question matter enough to make us change our mind? I don't think so.
We certainly didn't bargain for this. I guess we will have to wait and see what happens. I am sure it will work out the way it is supposed to. I just don't want to do anything to hurt (S).