Wednesday, May 19, 2010


Lately it seems like adoption is coming up everywhere. I was on the computer today at work and there was a popup about adoption.

Last night I was watching American Idol which was followed by a show called "Glee". Not one I normally watch but one of the sub-plots was about adoption.

I was using the button on the top of the blog page that says "next blog" and I have never gotten to a blog about adoption and today there were 2. One was by a person who was adopted and one by someone who had adopted 3 childen.

I am not sure what, if anything, to make of this. DW and I have already decided we will adopt (S). There is no question in our mind. I do worry about (S) when she gets older though and the "Glee" show as well as the one blog by the adoptee were about looking for ones biological mother. It got me to thinking about what we tell (S) about her bio-mother when she asks us.

I know it won't be for a while, but that seemed to be the theme. Apparently a lot of adopted children develop a fantasy about why they were put up for adoption to begin with, and when they go in search of their bio-parents, they have yet another fantasy about what kind of relationship they will have with their "blood relative"

I know (S)s fantasy won't be about the state taking her away from her family and bringing her to us. It is more likely to be something about a single woman who just couldn't keep her children and wanted a better life for them. How will she feel when she finds out her mother essentially chose her abusive father over her and her brothers?

I also know that if she wants, she will be told her parents name and she will always know where her brothers are. I would assume that by the time (S) is old enough to ask the questions, one of her brothers will probably know where her bio-parents are.

It makes me sad to think that she could potentially be very disappointed by what she finds out when she begins asking those questions. I guess we will have to work hard to make sure she is prepared for that day when it comes. I am not sure how to do that, but I think we have time...........then again

Time does fly with children......It seems like yesterday my bio children were playing and fighting in the back yard. My son is doing well on his own 1500 miles from home and I am very proud of him. I am also proud of my daughters. Last year I walked one of my daughters (K)down the aisle and come September, I will be walking (A) down the aisle......

As fast as they grow up, I guess it won't be that long before it will be (S)'s turn..........

I'm getting ahead of myself though. I am going over to Mom TV now to watch Adoption Angles. If you haven't seen it before, check it out Wednesdays 9:00pm Eastern at:


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