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So a lot has been happening, but I have been sick and not really in a mood to write. So let me try to get you all caught up.....There is good news and bad news. The good news first.
Good News.....We are expecting to get our signed papers back from the State Comissioner of Health and Human Services some time next week. At that point we can take our paperwork to the courthouse and get the fingerprint stuff as well as get a court date set up. We are getting more and more excited about that. We should be done with our adoption process sometime in november. Adoptions are done every Wednesday so we are keeping our fingers crossed that our Wednesday will be soon.
Good News.....Wednesday was (S)'s 5th birthday. (would have been nice if it was her adoption day huh?) She has been with us for close to 3 years now and this was another great milestone for her. She so much likes being the center of attention and thinks she is just "all that" whenever there is something special happening for her. This Sunday when we have her friends over for a kids party I am sure she will be the same way. We will be playing "Pin the Tail on the Donkey" and we have pumpkins for all the kids to decorate. Cake and ice Cream too of course.
Not So Good News.....DW got a call from the CW. She wanted to inform us that (S)s bio-dad was on the "hunt" again. There was a time this summer he and bio-mom were supposedly trying to grab the two older boys, but they weren't around so nothing happened. The police couldn't arrest them because they were nowhere near the boys, even though bio-mom said that was what they were doing there. So now we have to keep our eyes open and stay more alert again.
DW went to school to make sure they were aware of the situaiton that was brewing and to give them a picture of bio-mom and dad. The school has been fairly helpful in the past and they assured her that only DW or I will be allowed anywhere near her. That is good.
On the other hand, since that day, (S) has been impossible to get to bed at night. she has been saying she is scared of the dark and wanting any doors to any dark rooms closed. She has been insisting to sleep with the light on and wanting either me or DW to sleep next to her in bed. We make sure that we don't have the conversations about her bio-parents or what is happening around her, but she must have this instinct or some sense that these things are happening.
Last night when she wouldn't go to bed I got her on my lap and asked her exactly what was bothering her. She said she was scared of the dark and I asked her why. She said she was afraid that something bad would happen, and I asked her like what. She then said she was afraid that someone was going to take her away. I assured her that mommy and daddy would never let that happen.
I let her fall asleep in my lap and then when I put her into bed I stayed there with her for a few minutes to make sure she stayed asleep. Unfortunately she keeps getting up during the night. I know that the "ritual" that will take place in court is going to make things better for her. She knows that will make us her "forever" family, and she needs that now more than ever.
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Friday, October 15, 2010
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Poor S. I hope your date is very soon and that finalizing helps her feel more safe. Scary stuff about S's bio-parents. I'm glad the school is on board.
ReplyDeleteIf it helps my adopted daughter also has extremely bad fears in the dark, and for us one thing that helped was buying motion detector nightlights (from target I think or maybe homedepot) that I assure her come on if anyone walks in. Also some Christmas bells or alarm-chime on the door that would ring if the door is moved (and when I walk in she asked me to loudly assure her "don't worry its me mommy" even in her sleep).
ReplyDeleteAlso we leave all the doors open, and all the hall and non-bedroom (hallway/bath/etc) lights on. Good luck.