Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Good Days and Bad Days

Shyanne had a bad day yesterday. At one point she was under her desk at school kicking and screaming. She said she couldn't think about anything to write for the assignment she was given. The assignment was to write something interesting about yourself that could be passed along to the second grade teacher for next year. Her teacher gave her some suggestions, but she wasn't having any of it. She ended up having to go to the office and talk with the school counselor.

She got gummies out of it, and help with the assignment and seemed to feel a little better about it. The question is why did this occur. She has had bad days before, but never as bad as getting under her desk and kicking and screaming. Well, DW I think had the answer.

For those of you who have been around us for a while, you are well aware that Shyanne has had some issues around saying good-bye. When she was smaller, she would hide in the front hall closet instead of saying goodbye to people leaving our house. She would cry and still does when special people leave and on occasion will just run away and not acknowledge that these people are leaving. She doesn't seem to like the feeling of loss when people leave. We guess it is related to her loss of her biological parents. The last time she said good-bye to them was the last time she saw them. The last time she will see them. It has been a long time since she has seen her two oldest brothers as well, and the way things are going, I think it will be at least many years before she does see them again, if at all. DW thinks this school assignment evoked some of those feelings as she would be leaving her first grade teacher who she absolutely adores.

It has not been a serious issue in the past. By that I mean we haven't really addressed it because it didn't seem to cause any big deal and we figured over time this was something she would grow out of.......Getting under a desk in school and kicking and screaming however, is a big deal. So now we have to address it from that stand point and quite frankly, we are not sure what the best way to proceed is. I know when she next sees her play therapist, that will be a topic we will bring up. She is the expert in this area and we definitely need to get Shyanne some help dealing with hose issues. We can tell her all we want that she will see her teacher again in the school and over time, she will just be a pleasant memory of a wonderful teacher, but past experience tells Shyanne that sometimes when people leave, they just never come back.

That is sad, but unfortunately it is a part of life, that for any six year old is hard to understand, but it is more difficult for someone with Shy's past.


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