How Insightful Can A 6 Year Old Be?

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Pretty insightful!!

So, what brings this up. Shyanne has been going to "play therapy" for a few years now. Since she was about 3. She started with a wonderful woman in Maine who worked with her, as well as DW and me. Shy enjoyed going there. She got a chance to play with her. She had a lot of dolls and a doll house and some other age appropriate toys that she just loved to play with.

When we moved, one of our first priorities was to find a similar therapist here. We asked around a lot and finally got the name of a woman who had time to see her. She started seeing Shy, as well as DW and me, and we have been happy with her.

Shy has been happy with her too. She is no longer only wanting to play with dolls and doll houses though. She has advanced to some pretty interesting games. Some games of strategy as well that are billed for much older children, but none the less, she plays them. According to her therapist she not only plays them, but understands them, and understands the strategy involved in some pretty advanced games that she has. Usually games that she reserves for much older children.

That is not the insightful part though.

This past Tuesday Shyanne had an epiphany. She now has come to realize that she doesn't go there JUST "to play" as she previous thought. It is no longer a "play date" to her. It is someone she can talk to about all sorts of things. Someone who will understand and help her to understand issues and someone she can talk to.

Now that is pretty insightful for a 6 year old if you ask me!!

Of course I am happy that she is bright and insightful and "gets it" and all of that. It shows she is growing and maturing. All the things we hope for our children. On the other hand, I wish it wouldn't happen quite so fast.

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An Epiphany?

Epiphany is defined by Webster as "a sudden manifestation of the meaning of something". Thats a little highbrow for me. I just call it an "Oh Yeah" moment. You know when you are sitting there not even thinking about a particular item and all of a sudden something pops into your head and you go "Oh Yeah". Like I should have known that all along, or why was I so stupid to have never thought of that before. Anyway, I didn't have a profound one today, but none the less it did make me take time to stop and think.

I was sitting in the office minding my own business looking at a new program on the computer that we are going to start running. I was playing with all the different options and menus just to see what all it could do when it came to me. (S)'s mother had her, but (S) never really had her mother and now more than likely never will.

I can't even begin to imagine what life is like without a mother. I am lucky. My mother is 82 and I talk to her almost every night. How lucky are those of us who had a mother who cared about and for us. There comes a time when everyone passes on to the next world, and we are programmed to bury our parents, not our children. What is (S) life going to be like when she comes to the realization that her mom didn't die, but was just unable to take care of her. Will she think her mom didn't love her. I really think her mom loves her, she is just clueless about how to be a mom.

The more time I spend thinking about (S) and about other children in foster care, the more I believe in what DW and I are doing. I don't know if when (S) leaves us if she will remember us, but if she does, I just want her to leave us with the knowledge that we really did care for and about her. I still dread the day she leaves, but as the saying goes:

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened"