"Never Can Say Goodbye"

Clifton Davis


On Saturday we took (S) to visit with her 4 brothers at the local Mickey Ds. for about an hour or so.

(S) went to the daycare today and spent time with her BFF (she doesnt know what that means, but it fits) Anyway, it came time for her to leave and she will not see her BFF or anyone else for over 3 weeks while we are away.

(A) and her partner and his two children came over for dinner tonight. (S) was so happy to see them as they will all play with her and do anything she wants with them. They came over becasue we are going away for a few weeks and they wanted to see us before we left.

The thing that connects these three events? There came a time to say good-bye and (S) refused. This is not the first time. She does not like good-byes. I think this is also her problem with going to bed. She doesn't like being alone or saying good-bye. I believe it is just that she fears losing the people she loves.

This is fairly obvious as it happens to a lot of kids in foster care. The question is how do we help her get over this. Will she ever get over it. Is she developing or on the way to developing RAD? I don't know. I am not familiar enough with either RAD or foster care to know that. I certainly will mention it to the SW when she comes tomorrow. Hopefully she will have some good advice. If this is what is happening, I want to do whatever we can to prevent it.

Does it sound like this may be a problem to any of you? If so, what do you think we can do to prevent it from becoming a problem for (S)? This is the problem with new foster parents like ourselves. We lack the knowledge that experience will give us. I guess everyone has to start somewhere, but it is frustrating.